Did you hear the one...

True story!!! (What happened on my solo weekend in P'town.)

Saturday night, August 5th, 11:30 p.m.

I raced into the "disco" at the Pied looking for someone, ANYONE I knew. I saw Shelly Cullen and some other women I recognized standing by the sliding glass doors by the deck. I raced up to her.

“Did you see the woman who came in here with the ka…”

Immediately, a smile crept across my face. I realized how absolutely STUPID I was about to sound.

“The woman with the ka…” Uncontrolable giggles burst forth. I doubled over laughing, and took a deep breath to regain my composure.

“Did you see the woman who came in here with the kangaroo?!!”

“Are you DRUNK?!”

“No! I am TOTALLY serious!!!”

“Is this some sort of a pick up line?” She, and her friends, were all looking at me like I was completely delerious.

“No! There’s a woman in here with a kangaroo!”


5 minutes earlier…

I was paying the cover charge to get into the Pied. There were 2 cashiers and a woman standing beside them. The third woman appeared to be pondering whether or not she wanted to pay the cover charge. She had a small sack, from which a small face was looking at me. Out of the corner of my eye, I thought it was a small dog, a min pin or something. Then, being a dog-lover, I turned and looked at it.

“That is NOT a dog,” I thought. “It looks like… a kangaroo.”

“Is that a…” I screwed my face up…”a kangaroo??”

“Yes.”

“Ohmygod! Can I pet it?” (How many people can say they got to pet a kangaroo in a lesbian bar? Sounds like some sort of perverted euphemism, doesn’t it?) As I pet the animal, I asked what it’s name was.

“Kiwi.”

“What a great name!” Then a thought occurred to me. “Is it legal to own them in the US?”

“We’re from Canada. My partner is a breeder.”

We went inside. As I was coming from the Crown & Anchor and needed a wee break, I went to the loo. I was thinking how freakin’ weird what I just experienced really was. Then another question occurred to me. Everybody would want one when they saw how cute they are. How BIG do they get?

Thus, after the loo break, I went running out into the bar area and found Shelly. She wasn’t fully committed to believing me at that point so I went back to the check-in to ask those gals. They said she was still inside. As I turned to go back in, the woman was leaving, without her kangaroo! She said her partner still had it inside.

I went in search of it and found the woman. She corrected me. It was not a kangaroo but a wallaby. They get to be about 30 lbs and about hip high. She showed me it’s pouch. I took 2 pics with my cell phone, and if I figure out how, I will send the pics or post them somehow.

I found Shelly and she finally got to see and pet it too. We were both excited about seeing and getting to pet it. She kept saying it was the softest thing she’d ever touched.

Later the breeder was on the floor dancing, the wallaby in its bag. It’s used to that… the bouncing very close to normal, except for the pounding music, and the poor thing had very big ears. But I saw it roll into a ball while we were on the deck, which hid the ears quite well.

It leaves me thinking it sounds like a big joke. “Did you hear the one about the kangaroo that went into a dyke bar?” I’m still trying to think of a punch line… but I think most people will think I’m it!