My sister's letter to "our" parish priest

May 30, 2006

Fr. Jean-Paul Labrie, Pastor
St. Denis Catholic Church
143 Main Street
Fort Fairfield ME 04742

I am usually a firm believer of talking in person but I decided it would be best if I wrote to you instead. My parents, Paul & Jeanette Rediker left the Catholic Church last Sunday in tears. My sister is gay and has faced discrimination all of her life. Despite that and maybe because of the love and support my parents have shown her, she has grown up to be a loving, kind and decent human being. I am so blessed to have parents who would not turn their back on or disown a child because of who she is. Believe me when I tell you, this is who she is – not a lifestyle choice.

Yesterday they were met at the door by strangers as well as their neighbors with letters that were to be sent to our representatives to ban gay marriage. I cannot explain how hurt they were. My father has been a part of the church for 61 years. You have asked your community to discriminate openly against his daughter. I know that unless you are close to someone who is gay it’s hard to put a face to the person you are attacking. You may not realize the pain you are causing every person in that person’s life.

In my life the best lesson I have learned is to see if my actions are helping meet my goals. I want you to rethink your goals and realize that one of those outcomes is hurting the people in your community. I know that we are not the only people that were hurt by this. We are not the only members of the Catholic community who loves someone who is gay. I can see the love and dedication of marriage in same-sex couples and it is a beautiful thing. I only hope that you will open your mind and heart to realize that your gender does not determine your ability to fulfill someone’s life. God wants us to love our neighbors and accept everyone. Not just the ones we feel are adequate. My faith in the church is tested every time there is an anti-gay initiative passed down from Christians. I am so confused that the same people who tell us to love each other try to spread hate and intolerance. I don’t understand and it hurts every single time.

My parents will not be going to the Catholic Church anymore and neither will I and I feel their loss. I do not want you to have any contact with them regarding this decision. Any explanations that you have for choosing to allow this campaign to happen at St. Denis can only hurt them more. My parent’s hearts have been broken by this.

Nicole Rediker